The Dalai Mama

Another year has passed and I am more and more grateful for the gift you have given us in Minnow.  I know you would be so proud of the little man he is becoming.  He is talking up a storm and some days I can actually make out a few of the words in the flurry he throws at me. 

I want you to know that I think of you often and talk about you to Minnow.  I know he doesn’t understand now, but someday he will and I want him to know that we love and honor the choice you made.  I know the only way to really honor you is by raising him well, and I can say, “so far so good.”  I hope you know somewhere in your heart that he is loved and cared for.  I wish there was a way to let you know–I send out good thoughts to you always.  I like to believe that on some level we are forever connected and that half a world away you can feel my love for Minnow and for you.

I have been thinking about a ritual to honor you that Minnow can partake in.  I think we will begin to plant flowers in your honor.  Last year I planted tulips for you and sadly this spring wasn’t a good one and they did not come up in their full glory, but they still make me think of you every time I see them. 

I am a mother because of you.  You not only made yourself a mother–and don’t think that because you are not raising your son that you aren’t a mother–but you graciously, courageously and selflessly made me a mother too.  There are not words sufficient to express the gratitude that I hold in my heart for you.  I hope you are well and have found peace with your decision.  Please know that he is so very loved. 

On this day we will say a few words for you and I will tell Minnow the story of the bravest woman in the world–the one who gave Minnow to be our son.  Thank you just seems so insufficient a word but I must say it anyway.

Thank you. 

Love Minnow’s Mom

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